Gossip in the Workplace
By Mike Myatt, Chief Strategy Officer, N2growth
Gossip in the Workplace…At first blush the topic of gossip may seem like a subject more worthy of coverage on the entertainment channel than a blog written for CEOs and entrepreneurs. However as much as I wish it wasn’t so, gossip is alive and well in the world of business. Anyone who has been in business for any length of time has likely been on the receiving end of gossip that didn’t feel so good. While the emotional distress associated with gossip can be dealt with fairly easily, the political discord that can erupt in an organization can be nothing short of disastrous. In today’s post I’ll share my thoughts on how to control gossip in the workplace…
If what you desire as an executive is to have a healthy, thriving, and productive company, it is essential that you curtail office gossip. Gossip is one of the most divisive undercurrents pervading business as it allows for the unnecessary dispersion of negative innuendo for the pleasure of a few, and to the detriment of many…Show me a person that participates in gossip and I’ll show you someone who cannot be trusted. People who participate in gossip often times view their activity as being politically savvy when in fact gossip is the tool of insecure, rank amateurs…
I’ve written often on the importance of building solid relationships through displaying a consistency of character, creating a bond of trust, making good decisions, and striving to help others succeed. When you take part in gossip you do none of these things. In fact, gossip seriously undermines each one of the aforementioned success metrics by propagating inaccurate information. At its core, gossip is the highest form of disloyalty, and it is far from innocent or idle. Nothing can claim more tainted professional reputations, destroyed friendships, and polluted corporate cultures than gossip.
The best definition I’ve found for gossip is: “Gossip is talking about a situation with somebody who is neither a part of the solution or a part of the problem.” If you have a problem with a person, or take exception to a particular situation, go directly to the source. There are few things in life I loathe as much as those that don’t have the courage and integrity to hit things head on…If I have a problem with someone I give them the courtesy and respect of addressing the issue with them. Talking to anyone else wouldn’t resolve the issue, it would merely be self serving indulgence at someone else’s expense. In fact, it is my opinion that the worst form of gossip is conducted under the guise of seeking advice or counsel. If you need to seek the wisdom of a third party prior to addressing the root issue, do it generically and anonymously so as not to impugn the character of another.
In the same fashion that being the source of gossip is destructive, so is furthering the damage by ratcheting up the rhetoric by participating in gossip. If someone comes to you about a problem with another person, immediately redirect that individual back to the person in question. If that doesn’t work, and you must get involved, offer to accompany the person with the problem in addressing the individual they have an issue with. I have watched many a well intentioned executive get sucked into gossip in an attempt to help, only to pay a big price down the road for their error in judgment. If you want to be a long-term survivor in business I would suggest that you not participate in gossip and get rid of those that do. Remember that those individuals that will gossip to you, will also gossip about you…
Many would suggest that the thought of eliminating gossip in the corporate world is an exercise in naivete. They would take the position that gossip is just part of human nature, and that gossip will always exist in any type of environment where social dynamics are present. The old saying “it is what it is” is only true until you decide to make a difference. As a leader it is incumbent upon you to do the right thing, which is to protect your reputation and those that you work with. Furthermore, allowing anyone under your charge to participate in any activity to the contrary makes you an accomplice in the decline of morale, and the decay of your corporate culture. Put simply, good leaders don’t tolerate gossip…
This statement is what is currently wrong with corporate America…
“If you have a problem with a person or take exception to a particular situation go directly to the source.”
In my career, I have seen very few people that are willing to confront the brutal facts.
For a somewhat relevant example… consider performance reviews. How often have managers been able to tell their long term employee that they are not performing? Even in this structured environment of a performance review, they can not seem to deliver the right message and confront the facts.
This type of direct dialog that you highlight in your post takes practice. People are often embarrassed or unsure how to even approach the subject. I believe it is a very easy conversation, if…
You bring data.
The gossip will quickly come to an end if leadership requires the use of ‘true data’ in all decision making processes. Ignore those who don’t use data… and reward those that do.
Always enjoy your posts!
Michael
http://blog.informedleaders.com
A friend of mine, head of a large department, had a neat trick. When someone reported untrue gossip to him, he'd say (calmly), "Oh, well, you know, that's quite untrue. Who did you hear that from? Let's go back to them and make sure they know what the facts are." So he'd immediately get the third person into the room and dispel the rumor. Of course, he'd then ask where that person heard the rumor, and go back to the new source in another three way meeting, as well. He only had to do this a couple of times before the rumor mill slowed way down as people realized that they could get the facts more directly from my friend and that he didn't react with offense when confronted by negative rumors, simply with corrections and the assumption that people thrive on the truth and would rather have that.
Thanks for sharing the great tip…this is exactly the right way to deal with gossip.
Hi Mike,
I've noticed that when someone comes running to you with gossip and you take a stand by not contributing to the rumours, they actually admire you for it in the end.
"Gossip is talking about a situation with somebody who is neither a part of the solution or a part of the problem."
By the way, did you read the above quote in Rick Warren's "The Purpose-Driven Life"? I'm currently reading this and found that definition to resonate with me also.
Hi Andrew:
Thanks for the comment. I agree that when it comes to gossip, not adding fuel to the fire is a great stance to adopt. I'm a big Rick Warren fan and didn't actually realize that was his quote, but I appreciate you bringing that to my attention. It's been a few years since I read "The Purpose-Driven Life," but I found it to be a wonderful and inspiring read. Thanks again for the comment Andrew.
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